Terror: My Comment In Response To A Post By Ziggy Kinsella

Terror

I like to read Ziggy Kinsella’s blog The Feckless Goblin. It’s pretty cool if you ask me. One day I received one of her tweets (you see, I follow her on Twitter), and I rushed over to said blog to read her latest post. It was a really good one.

I read her post Tough on the causes of fear… and for some reason, I was compelled to write. I was stoked to leave a comment, and wrote something I never dreamed I’d ever get down on paper. It terrified me at the time I wrote it. It terrifies me now as I sit here in the quiet of my house late at night, alone in my livingroom while my Youngling slumbers peacefully upstairs. They say writing is cathartic. It can be. This time, though, I’m not sure what to think. I still have no idea why I felt the need to write this experience on paper. Maybe it’s all a part of my “facing my fears mind set” thing I have going on these days. Anyways, take from it what you will. Whether to believe it or not, well, that’s up to you. But tell me, what are you afraid of?

Originally posted as a comment at The Feckless Goblin, author Ziggy Kinsella’s blog, in response to her challenge, reproduced here at The Scribe’s Desk for your reading pleasure. I give you my comment, newly titled Terror. Much thanks to Ziggy Kinsella for the inspiration to write this. Enjoy!

Terror

What scares the hell out of me? Well, I’ll tell you.
When I was 15, I lay in the comfort of my cozy single bed. My room was small and every shape, silhouette and shadow was familiar to me. It was my safe place, my sanctuary. Then one night, for no apparent reason, a presence entered my room. I heard a growl right by my right ear. So close I could feel it’s breath. I was PETRIFIED with an incomprehensible fear. I could not move and every sense strained for reason — an explanation — though I knew there was no answer that would seem logical or believable. My breath stopped and held tight in my chest, my body so rigid, every muscle tensed, frozen.
I began to pray like I never prayed before in my life. Babbling bits and pieces of remembered prayers, warnings from my mother about spirits and what to do to protect yourself if ever you were unlucky enough to draw their attention. Then slowly I released my breath, listening to the darkness.
Just as I started to relax, thinking I had imagined it, there it was again, that low, deep, menacing growl at the foot of my bed. Feverishly I began to pray again, begging for protection and willing whatever it was come to terrify me to be banished from me, from my room.
The inky darkness retreated and vanished and the moon shone brightly in my window again; as if whatever it was that had visited me had obscured the moon’s pale, silvery, reassuring light.
I have never felt such terror. I was exhausted from it.
Immediately I turned on my excruciatingly bright reading lamp that was clamped to my headboard, and lay wide eyed and filled with dread in my little bed. I no longer felt safe, and from then on for many years later, I slept with the light on. Even now, I sleep in the safety of a little nightlight in my room and in the upstairs hallway.
I don’t like to think about what happened that night in the darkness for fear of drawing the notice of that terrible entity once more. I have never written it down like this before now. And even now, in the safety of daylight in my livingroom with my daughter playing on the floor, the TV on and the comfort of my laptop on my lap, I tremble. What will I unleash in the writing of this?
What did I do to come to the attention of the monster that lurks in the blackness? I don’t know. But everyday of my waking life, I am aware of the things that hover just beyond the light, waiting. Each night before I go to bed, I push away the memory of that night, refusing to think about it.
It scares me now, and I think it always will.

*Originally written Sunday, May 9, 2010, by Kyra Dawson as a comment on The Feckless Goblin, author Ziggy Kinsella’s blog.

Tags: Believe, blogging, challenge, comment, cool, fear, goblin, horror, mindbending, question, recommend, terror, writing

If You Want To Know What To Expect On This Blog, Read This

Nothing happens unless first we dream ~ Carl Sandburg

I am a writer. I like to write about the things that interest me. This is one of the simple things that makes me happy. I wanted to share with you the kinds of things you will find here on this blog. It’s probably a little different than what you might be expecting; but my wish for you is that you have as much fun reading the things I write here as I have in the thinking, and the writing of these words and ideas.

You see, like myself, this blog is a myriad of facets and elements. This blog is a labyrinthine collection, and a meandering mosaic of writing. It’s filled with the things I find not just interesting, but also amazing, intriguing, entertaining, engaging, appealing, silly, and ponder-worthy. Sometimes the posts will be short. Sometimes they will be long. Sometimes they will fall somewhere in between, or have just one line. 99% of the time, you’ll see images. I like to use images a lot. I am a very visual person, and I think images spice up the posts quite nicely. And the categories, well, as you will see, my list is unusually long; and that’s OK, because I like to write about a lot of different things. That’s where the whole eclectic writer thing comes in. Besides, there’s no real hard and fast rules for blogging, is there? Aren’t personal blogs meant to be as original and unique as each individual writer is?

So on any given day, at any given time, I could be writing about what cucumber sandwiches remind me of, my much beloved Youngling and my much beloved others, my adventures in reading, or my random musings and attempts at philosophy. You may also notice the odd run on sentence, as I tend to be quite loquaciously articulate at times.

One thing you will discover without fail, is that I love movies. This blog is filled with my unique contemplations of cinema, and with the exploration of my understanding and interpretation of movies of all kinds. I have an obsessive kind of love affair with movies. More than anything else other than writing, reading, and spending time with my Youngling and beloveds, I love spending time with movies. I am not ashamed to say that I am a BIG TIME movie geek, and you will find A LOT of inner musings and odes to the movies I adore on this site.

So, if you are looking for a more tailored, streamlined or rigid read, this may not be your 4 o’clock cup of ginseng tea. But if you just want to visit a friendly place created by a dreamer, have some fun, and free your mind from the daily grind, then this is the pumpernickel for you!

So be well, and happy reading! I hope you have as much fun as I do. And that, my dear readers, is my wish for you.

Your Brighter Scribe…

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.“
~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Tags: blogging, books, Brighter Scribe, movies, reading, writer, writing, Youngling

10 Ways To Make It A Great Year — I Mean 12

Be Happy Now!

Sometimes I’m a tardy poster. Sometimes I procrastinate. Sometimes I burn dinner. And usually, I bite off more than I can chew and end up underneath a pile of overwhelmed stew. Oh well, such is the life of a writer and a mom, and that is just how I roll. So this year, I am implementing a list called 12 Ways To Make It A Great Year. Why is it 12 ways and not 10? I have no idea. Sometimes things just work that way. So here goes:

12. Answer emails when I get them.

11. Post every second day, aim for everyday, but don’t get down on myself if 3 days go by before there is a post. It happens.

10. Write everyday, even if I’m feeling uninspired.

9. Sleep more.

8. Worry less.

7. Don’t feel guilty about relaxing. I deserve it!

6. Be kind to myself in all ways.

5. Laugh even more than I already do and cry if I need to. Crying’s not always a bad thing, especially if you laugh a lot.

4. Celebrate myself more than once in a while and embrace even my flaws; they make me who I am, and that is a very good thing.

3. Spend more time with my family.

2. Spend more time with my Youngling and savor each and every moment because little ones grow up so fast and go off to college before you know it.

1. Be happy NOW! Why waste time being sad when there can be bliss everyday, even if it is in the tiniest of moments.

What will you do to make it a great year? Comment and let me know!

And now, on to my tardy post!

Tags: Bliss, happy, NOW, writing, Youngling

Happy Mother’s Day!

Enjoy Your Day!

Happy Mother’s Day to all you special Moms out there!

Eat Cake and Be Merry!

Today is your day to do all the things you enjoy. To catch up on rest, to have breakfast in bed, to stay in your PJ’s all day, or spend quiet time in the garden and quality time with yourself. Go to the spa, or go for a walk. Go surfing, go hiking, or go horseback riding. And if you are a writer like me, I know you’ll be doing what you do best, which is write, write, write to your heart’s content! Whatever it is that makes you happy, have fun doing it — guilt free!

So eat cake and be merry! Enjoy your day!

Your Brighter Scribe….

Tags: Happy Mother's Day, writing

Change Is Inevitable

It Wasnt Me!

They say a writer is tortured when they are not writing. I believe that to be true. That being said, more writing is coming and very soon. I have a very cool interview with Daniel Henshaw arriving very, very soon. Also, there will be some changes happening with The Scribe’s Desk. Not too sure yet exactly what or how, but rest assured, change is inevitable!

Also, exciting news on an upcoming book release! I am very stoked about that one!

More to come soon! Stay tuned!

Your Brighter Scribe…;)

Tags: book release, cat, change, cool, Daniel Henshaw, happening, inevitable, interview, scribe, The Scribe's Desk, writer, writing